Why save sex for marriage?

First year students are persons of interest to many individuals and groups on the college or university campus.  The transition from home to dormitory life and higher academic demands may have a positive or negative impact on a person’s future.  What does a young person do to maintain his or her personal integrity, sense of self-worth and retain healthy family relations while establishing personal independence?

Consider some of the traps a student should avoid in order to continue growing as a healthy, whole person:

Alcohol. The ease with which an underage student can obtain a driver’s license that establishes “legal” drinking age is commonplace.  Our counsel: AVOID this trap.  WHY???  Better yet, WHY NOT???  With “legality” to party at a public facility, the environment exposes a person to others from off campus. Much older men or women may single out the vulnerable student who’s acting immaturely mature.  With alcohol intake, mental impairment is in effect, poor judgments may be made and sexual inhibitions are reduced.  This impaired condition places the “drinker” in a situation for being the object of sexual assault or a perpetrator.  This impaired condition places the “drinker” in a situation for being an accomplice or perpetrator of a crime of misdemeanor or felony status that includes purchase, use and sale of illegal drugs, brawling, destruction of property and theft.  This impaired condition produces the “next day” hangover or depression that is both unpleasant and effects classroom productivity and otherwise healthy relationships.

Alcohol again. When the trap to “get a 21 year old identity” is avoided, alcohol is still waiting for the un-initiated.  Students with”identity cards” or others of legal age stand ready to be a supplier of alcohol or drugs to the vulnerable student so all can experience alcohol or drug intoxication.  Let’s all share in looking stupid and feeling terrible the day after!  Our counsel: AVOID this trap!

Friends.  Avoid “friends” of the opposite sex or same sex who may dump you with ease and are out for a fun time, often at your expense, and treat you as an object of pleasure. Avoid infatuations that initiate a sexual relationship with future promises that most often are unfulfilled and empty. The “high” feeling of infatuation is temporary.  Depression follows when rejection and reality is experienced…a sexually transmitted disease or a pregnancy.  True love found in solid friendships is not built on “high” party animal feelings or exclusiveness that cuts out your regular friends.  True friends are trustworthy, honest and steadfast no matter how stupid and dumb you act. Our counsel:  LEARN FROM THE MISTAKES OF OTHERS BEFORE YOU DO THE SAME THING!  AVOID MISTAKES WHERE AND WHEN POSSIBLE!!  LEARN FROM YOUR MISTAKES!!! DON’T MAKE THE SAME MISTAKE TWICE!

Consider some of the tools that keep you a healthy, whole person:

Family.  Strong relationships with mom and dad should be cultivated during college years. This doesn’t mean talking with parents every day, but to maintain respect for their advice and to establish moral values for yourself.  Sometimes, parents have not been outstanding role models.  Part of growing up is learning that parents do make mistakes with their personal lives, but you should learn from their mistakes.

Faith.  We all have a spiritual-ness as human persons that needs nurturing; something unseen about us that is experienced in human relationships.  The majority of the world’s population expresses some form of outward acknowledgement of a superior power that created the universe and exerts a presence somehow in daily living.  The person who acknowledges a human code of conduct that respects others, is honest, loyal, patient, responsible and persevering tends to avoid behaviors that hurt themselves and others.  Use of the tool of faith will enable students to withstand peer pressure to become sexually active, to engage in alcohol or drug consumption or to cheat and lie.

Friends.  Selection of friends is important to maintaining self-respect, a sense of self-worth and to avoid negative peer pressure.  Childhood friends may go their separate ways when the growth through late adolescence takes place.  New friends may have a positive impact on one person and a negative impact on another.  Sorting through the value of friendship is a tall task.  And sorting through the selection of a mate for life is very serious.  The emotional bonding that transpires with sexual intimacies sticks with a person for a lifetime. Memories of multiple sexual encounters will replay in the person’s mind throughout a marriage, and may be detrimental to the success of that marriage.